Down on the hop farm…
And now. Updates from my life as a gardener.
Meet the newest hop, a lil’ Chinook named Babyface. Babyface as aspirations of being a rapper. I don’t have the heart to tell him that the name Babyface is already taken.
And THIS is Emilio. He’s a sophomore in high school, and quite a hit with the ladies, I must say. He’s a leafy version of me.
Finally, William the Willemette. All grow’d up. *sniff*
A hop experiment goes awry after turning to blows
Take a good long look at this picture. God willing it will be the last time you see Jeff, MNB brewmaster, holding a bottle of Coors Light. We unsuccessfully attempted a hop-tasting experiment last night by infusing tasteless Coors Light with different strands of hops. Jeff painstakingly crushed the pellets, unscrewed the Coors bottles, dumped the hop powder in, and screwed the lids back on.
We waited. We gathered our drinking glasses, Dixie cups and the like. We waited some more. We huddled in a circle while Jeff opened a bottle. It exploded over all of us.
As did the next bottle. Joel suggested placing the rest of them in refrigeration for a week. It’s a terrible idea, but we did it anyway.
A hop experiment turns to blows
After listening to an episode of Basic Brewing Radio, Jeff came up with a genius idea. We’ve been wanting to get a better feel for specific hop flavors/aromas and what they add to a beer. Instead of actually brewing beer to perform a controlled experiment, we’re going to do the next best thing… drink Coors Light.
Tonight we will be trying about a dozen different hop varieties by adding them individually to a 12-pack of Coors Light. We chose Coors because it doesn’t really taste like much so we should get a better sense of the hop contributions.
Unfortunately, this means that one of us will have to BUY a 12-pack of Coors Light. There has already been some fierce debate. Joel has outright refused, proving once again that he is not a team player ? and, in fact, a major tool. I might have to take one for the team on this one, but to all you MNB guys: YOU OWE ME BIG.
(FYI, do a Google Image search for Coors Light and see how many pics of scantily-clad females come up. That’s how you know Coors Light tastes so good.)
Captain Nosewater, the pirate hop
In honor of the pirate-themed Swashchuckler IPA (and Anchorman), I’ve named the next hop sprout, a Cascade, Captain Nosewater. He’s just a little guy right now, but come October I’m going to put an eye patch on him. He’ll be the terror of the garden.
Meet Emilio, the Cascade hops vine
In honor of the legendary movie, The Might Ducks, I’ve named my second hops sprout Emilio. Like the Mighty Ducks ? and Monday Night Brewery ? Emilio is a fighter. Sure, he might not have the latest hockey equipment. But I’m sure someone will pitch to buy new sticks and uniforms for everyone right before the big game.
quack… Quack… QUACK… QUACK!!!
William the hop vine claims life
I’ve decided to name each one of my hop vines as they sprout. Meet William the Willemette vine. He’s all green and awesome. I hate to break it to all the ladies out there, but I could definitely see myself marrying one of these vines. I’ve never been more proud of anything in my life.
*sniff* Thanks William… You… You complete me… *sniff*
IT’S ALIIIIIVE!!
There has been a conspicuous lack of sexiness in our blog lately. The reason: I’ve been away on a company retreat, complete with a high ropes course (which I CRUSHED). Unfortunately, During the 2 nights and 3 days that I was away, I was panicking about my most recent endeavor, growing hops.Fortunately, I had no reason to panic. Saturday I planted 4 Cascade vines, 2 Willemette vines and 2 Chinook vines.
From the picture you can see that I decided to put the pots on our sand volleyball court. I’m going to teach the Cascades to bump, set & spike later, just as soon as I can afford tiny knee pads. I’ve been watering them religiously, and was worried that 3 water-free days (with no rain) would end my hop farmer aspirations.
But upon my return… lo and behold… A lone Willemette sprout was peaking its way through the soil, just smiling at me as if to say “I could kick some serious Cascade ass on the volleyball court.”
Look for updates on my baby hops. We’re going to start experimenting a bit more with natural ingredients and hopefully organic beers in coming months.